My Biggest Fear

So perhaps from the title, you might expect this to be a song that is sad or slow and all emotional. I really tried NOT to do that. However, I think in a human experience we all really are afraid of so many things, and this is a song about all of those things. Dying, not knowing what to say, or how to say what you need to say, being forgotten, being ignored, being vulnerable, being weak, being strong, and everything in between. The verses all start off the same way..."On the days when..." fill in the blanks. I know I have days when I've forgotten how to breathe and have to remind myself how to. I have days when I feel like I could conquer the world, but don't know where to start. And then I have days where I am reminded just how darn human I am, and can't seem to find my keys, let alone fulfill my dream of being an artist and creator and singer and good mom, and good wife, and all of that. I think this is the most human song I've written to date and perhaps the most relatable. 

On that note, this song shows up on this record twice.  Once (track 2)  as how my bass player, engineer, producer, friend, and colleague, Geoff Smith, and I might play it live...super simple, and how I heard it when I first wrote it. Geoff listened to every crazy idea I had about this song, and I really can't thank him enough for that. He spent so much time on this track alone and tried everything I asked him to. I owe him a lifetime supply of dark chocolate and scotch for that alone. 

 And once (track 12)  in the vein of Brian Wilson (hence California Remix edition) fully realized by my friend, colleague, and songwriting mentor and cheerleader, Ravi Krishnaswami. I met Ravi during my time at VCFA (my grad program) and have always admired his endless supply of creativity and killer guitar skills and was honored to have him add all the things that Brian Wilson might have asked for on this tune. 

 

 

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